This week for the first time since my mom passed away almost one year now, I consciously acknowledged my husbands’ feelings about my mom passing. I have been in my own tunnel and he has been my light through it all. Earlier this week I was in that tunnel and he was guiding me though, somehow I saw a different light in my head and I asked him, how have you been doing, I know you loved mom too?; and I really listened to him. Thank you my ROCK for always having that light to take me through my tunnels even when I was not there to see you through yours… I love you…
Two nights ago I was sitting in the very chair looking at video clips and pictures of mom and my flood gates opened; my first reaction was to go into my tunnel, but I started thinking WWJD (what would Judith do)? This is what I think Judith would do; she would look at these clips and picture and tell a story about each of them, what she was doing, where the picture was taken, why the picture was taken, etc.. So I started looking at each picture and video clip a different way, rather then seeing them as my mom is gone, I started seeing them as; my mom is right here in my heart, in her children and grandchildren heart, in her son-in-law heart, in her nieces heart, in the heart of everyone she came into contact with during her time here on earth. My mom made a lot of positive impact on people and I know she had lots of plans to do so much more, but God had different plans. Did I agree with His plan, no, but it is not up to me, I just have to go along with His plans. That was between Him and mom and I believe mom was ok with the plan after awhile as she would alway say, “don’t worry, it is well with my soul”.
As a trained counselor I know this is going to take sometime for me to get through. My friend Micky Dread (R.I.P) would say “Life is a Journey, Life is a Stage, make sure when the spotlight hits you you are ready to perform”
I am taking it one breath at a time. #LiveLoveLaugh #LightLovePray
Grandma was the best. I miss her too. But I don’t really cry anymore because she’s in my heart, like you said.
Hi Steph. You will always have some days when you get in the tunnel but then there is that light at the end of the tunnel. Greiving has no time limit when you lose someone you love. Your ROCK is by your side and that means a lot.
Your motto : LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH.